If anything about fly fishing gets you down – and I mean really gets you down – maybe it isn’t for you. Maybe you should try wing shooting or surfing or sneaker collecting or  curling. But I am virtually certain that the same kind of things that can get you flustered in fly fishing are present in all those, and any other activity. Challenge, expense… and people.

Challenge is part of it. If fly fishing is hard, keep at it. You’ll get it. I’m convinced that if you are a terrible angler that there is a fish out there that is worse yet at looking out for itself. Something is going to bite. And through a process of natural fly fishing selection, you’ll slowly evolve into a better  version of yourself.

Expense is also a part of it. But it doesn’t have to be a huge part of it. You can spend a little and get a lot. All you really need is terminal tackle, a few woolly buggers, and a license. There is a lot of noise out there about all the other stuff you can get. But even the most well-equipped fly fisher is going to own less than what is available in toto.

Thus, dealing with challenge and expense is a you issue. You can work through those things and be okay with what you can do and not do; what you own and what you don’t own. If, after a prolonged period of time, you’re still addled with angst? Fly fishing might not be for you.

But what about people?

People are unavoidable in fly fishing. You fish downstream from someone. You buy flies from someone. You buy fly tying materials from someone. You steward the same resource as someone. You fish upstream from someone.  We’re all connected, in a web of tight-knight ecosystems and a loose associations.

Some thrive on the culture. The fly shop is as good as, or better than, the river. After all, your success rate is 100% at the fly shop. Others can’t stand small talk and the scent of others’ splitshot. Regardless of how much of  an angling hermit you style yourself to be, you’re still a part of the greater culture of fly fishing. (In fact, like the pioneers of the monastic movements, you might even be a revered member of the fly fishing culture.) There’s no way around it. And that is a huge hurdle for some. An angst-addling, insurmountable hurdle.

My briefest advice? I’ll co-opt a much greater maxim for our purposes: If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all (fly fisher)men.

I know it isn’t easy. Overcoming actual fishing challenges and economic factors might seem  simple compared to dealing with people. And some out there have dealt with incredible circumstances: poachers, vandals, assailants. Thankfully those are few and far between. Most of us just have to deal with that jerk, so-and-so or what’s-her-face, on social media.

Inconvenience and annoyance are real. Often what gets us up in arms is a little silly. Who wears what. How many pictures. This type of fishing. That kind of music. Those companies. Nymphs. Tenkara. Instagram. Vests. Dry flies. Flat bills. We’re not talking about fishing redds, snagging trout, or Pebble Mine… we’re talking about hats. And we wonder why it is hard to have an adult conversation about climate change.

You have the power to control those things, though. It is fly fishing. Fight the battles that are worth shedding a little blood. Have a sense of humor. Be able to joke and to take a joke. Otherwise, take it all with a grain of salt. You can rise above it. Have your preferences, sure. Don’t wear this or fish that way – no one says you have to do it all to be nice. Just don’t begrudge those who do, or get all frustrated that they exist. It is fly fishing. Have fun. Protect rivers. Catch fish. Be nice.