Ah, technology. Today I went fishing and live streamed it across the universe. Using Instagram, I recorded myself on my cell phone and allowed the public to join me on my adventure.

As you may be aware, I hadn’t caught a fish in the month of September. Trying times, these. I saw an opportunity in my day to fish in a spot that I knew would be sick with panfish. There are carp, there are smallmouth, but there are lots and lots of panfish.

If you’ve ever watched fishing shows on television before, you are probably well aware that all they do is catch fish. Big bass after big bass. Bill Dance is in a constant state of unhooking 7 pound fish.

I knew that this was the expectation that my audience would have going into my live stream. So I stacked the deck in my favor, made sure the beard and mustache looked good in the mirror, tied my fly on, and action.

I froze. What do I do? What do I say? Should I show myself or reverse the camera and show the water? A few seconds in and I’ve stared blankly, the awkwardness only being slightly reduced by the fact that I’m wearing mirrored sunglasses.

Instagram does you the favor of showing you how many people are watching you. Or, conversely, how many people are not watching you. It became immediately apparent that this was going to be an exercise in futility.

I began to use pointless interjections. I commented on random things in my surroundings with nonsensical remarks. People were leaving the live stream.

But I caught a fish. It was a small, spunky pumpkin seed. I released it quickly, and had a brief interaction with a passerby. This is what daytime Emmys are made of.

All in all, it wasn’t the worst experience in the world. For me, anyway. For the half dozen folks that stumbled upon my Instagram account for those few minutes, their take might be something a bit more superlative.

I don’t think I’ll try this again anytime soon. I mean, I might. Maybe with different subject matter? Maybe once I hit five or six thousand followers? When it comes down to it, I’m just afraid I’m gonna drop my phone in the water.

Anyway, if you don’t follow me on Instagram: you should. Because today you missed out on something unique, something special, something shared by only a select few.

A man, talking to himself, catching a sunfish.